#044 – Psychiatric Admission – Day 11

It’s 4:30am and I am wide awake. The nurses encourage me to go back to bed but I figure I might aw well be up doing something rather than tossing and turning in bed. I didn’t have as much joy on my new seeping med’s as the previous night. Typical bloody benzo’s. I build up a tolerance so quickly. It’s one of those medications I can see myself increasing once I’m home and out of hospitalisation. We’ll see what happens with that? I still don’t get how people get addicted to benzo’s especially people who are taking small doses of diazepam. I spend a lot of my day in the common area which is next to the nurses station where the hand out med’s. All day long people are hassling the nurses for valium with a lot of people pleading their case as to why they need it so bad. I’m written up valium but I have never taken advantage of it… not even once (Blog #014)

I went out to the beach with my old’s. Had coffee and drove around. I was only with them for an hour or so but I was keen to get back to the hospital. This place has become my second home. I have had 14 admissions and spent weeks, even years of my life in hospital. Where has it got me!? The days are adding up on this admission too. Day 12 and there’s no talk of going home yet. Gem (psychiatrist) will bring this up at some stage. I can leave whenever I feel ready… I’m just not there yet.

Published by aperfecttool83

I'm a 37 year old who lives in Melbourne Australia. I have many interests but I want to base this blog on my mental health. I have schizophrenia, depression & anxiety. I have 15 years experience with psychiatrists and I have had close to 20 hospital admissions. I plan on writing about my delusions, voices, paranoia, depression and how to deal with them psychiatrists :) I really hope this blog can help someone. Please feel free to contact me and I promise to get back to you. Have a nice day!

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