#043 – Psychoanalysis and Med’s as a Teenager

I was a messed up child and teenager. My folks sent me to a child psychologist when I was 15 and I went through psychoanalysis and was medicated. I was put on Venlafaxine (Effexor). My mum found a poem based around suicide in my wallet and this set off alarm bells. I had just got into Nirvana and idolised Kurt Cobain. I romanticised about suicide and Kurt was a good ambassador of this (Blog #018) Looking back I don’t think I was suicidal. I was just angry and going through some teenage angst. I would never have gone through with the act. Even now twenty years later I think about offing myself but I couldn’t leave the mess it would create behind. My voices tell me to harm and kill myself every hour of every day (Blog #032)

I didn’t think of it as being abnormal but I used to cut myself as a young kid too (Blog #029) This continued into my adult years where it escalated. I should also note that I went through a short goth phase when I’d listen to Marilyn Manson, Korn, Placebo etc. As with most teens that go through this stage I was just pissed off with the world and rebellious. Music can be some pretty powerful stuff!

Published by aperfecttool83

I'm a 37 year old who lives in Melbourne Australia. I have many interests but I want to base this blog on my mental health. I have schizophrenia, depression & anxiety. I have 15 years experience with psychiatrists and I have had close to 20 hospital admissions. I plan on writing about my delusions, voices, paranoia, depression and how to deal with them psychiatrists :) I really hope this blog can help someone. Please feel free to contact me and I promise to get back to you. Have a nice day!

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