#001 – Welcome to this Mess!

Welcome to all. As I sit here on my hospital bed I ponder what got me to this place again? Lets get it out there… This is my 14th psychiatric admission in as many years. Where does one start?! Do I begin with my first psychotic attack? My stay in the Intensive Care Unit at the Melbourne clinic under professor Burrows, the numerous medications I have swallowed, my bouts of serious self-harm, the angels and demons that contest for my soul, the horrible stress I have put my parents under? My drug and alcohol battles?

So let’s start by describing what I want to accomplish with this blog. First of all I’m using this a tool to help me from going insane with boredom. I have a lot of hours to fill during the day and night. The hospital offers a lot of groups and activities… non of which stimulate me as they have been done many times before. Many times! Another reason I enjoy doing this because of my passion for computers and the web. I have my diploma in graphic design and visual communication and I love web design. Lastly I have always been a prolific journal writer. I have dozens of books filled with my my ramblings and thoughts. I have always found writing to be therapeutic but once the book is full it gets tossed to the side and never really reflected back on. This is similar except in digital form… and it’s here for the whole world to get a small glympse into the working of Dave’s brain. I’m also enjoying using my new laptop!

So here I sit. Medicated and ready for sleep… if I manage to find it?! The smoking room closes at 10pm so I find it easier to sleep rather than go through the nicotine withdrawals. I smoke too much whenever I’m in hospital.

Cheers for reading. There will be plenty more to come in other posts.

Published by aperfecttool83

I'm a 37 year old who lives in Melbourne Australia. I have many interests but I want to base this blog on my mental health. I have schizophrenia, depression & anxiety. I have 15 years experience with psychiatrists and I have had close to 20 hospital admissions. I plan on writing about my delusions, voices, paranoia, depression and how to deal with them psychiatrists :) I really hope this blog can help someone. Please feel free to contact me and I promise to get back to you. Have a nice day!

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